I think I have a tendency to steal...

...from others. Anything. Everything.

Sometimes it's not like I want to steal. I just always end up in situations where people force things which are not mine into my hands, and make me look like I'm stealing.

Sometimes I don't even possess what they accused me of stealing. You know how pathetic that is? I don't have a defence. At least I should get the compensation. But nope. I'm not that lucky.

I've never intended to steal in the first place. When you advised me not to do that, I was like, "Steal? How? I don't even know how to steal!"

Which is why I think, it's never going to be mine. Coz I'm too soft-hearted to know how to steal. I'm never going to be able to stab a person's heart without sustaining a deep cut on my own hand. I realised this when I hurt the person who loved me.

Ingrid said something really meaningful that day. She said it's not easy to "be willing to give up a person who loves you, for a person who is not willing to love you".

I don't see it as courage though. It is never a positive thing to hurt someone, especially one who loved you with all his heart. I see this as punishment. It is a gift from God when you have someone who loves you, which is why if you do not cherish but choose to forgo this happiness, you will get your punishment. You will be doomed to become the gift for someone else, who will never cherish you...

The more I figured out, the more I do not understand. I see no reason why things happened the way they did. Maybe you needed more than a mere feeling of comfort...

Sorry, I don't know what crap I'm talking about. Haven't been blogging in a long, long time. It'll be easier to understand next time, I suppose.